the back entrance of culpepper house, san myshuno, 12:35pm
meanwhile, back at the ranch, owen and jared finally finished packing up all of jordan’s belongings. within a three hour span, jordan has a) watched jared and owen argue about the ending of inception, b) broken up 2 minor slap fights and c) helplessly watched owen “accidentally” damage random items belonging to jared. jordan can put up with a lot but right now, her patience is running T H I N.
jared: everything is loaded up into the truck. would have gone faster if i had actual help with me. (mocking) i know owen’s extremely delicate body can’t lift much.
owen: (smug) well, i don’t lift things for a living like you (jared rolls his eyes) but i do fine….(turns to jordan) i guess we’re leaving the bed frame here?
jared: (mutters) well we can’t break it down, professor dickhead, because you put it together in the absolute worst way possible. (aggravated sigh) one more thing i gotta throw away…(turns to jordan) j, just buy a new one from ikea…
owen: (smug) wow! would you look at that?! he had a good idea, for once. look at his brain wrinkle in real time (jared exhales sharply) jordan, we can go there after we move everything over. they open till 9 and i have been having a craving for their meatballs and–
jared: (annoyed) SHE is an adult and can go on her own.
owen: (snaps) i know she can go on her own! i just like going to ikea and i’m sure she’d appreciate my company over yours, you goddamn asthmatic ass–
jordan quickly lifts her finger and places each one on their lips
jordan:(screaming) SHHHH. SSSSHUT UP. JUST SHUT UP. THE BOTH OF YOU. FOR LIKE 2 GODDAMN SECONDS. YOU TWO HAVE BEEN AT EACH OTHER THROATS ALL MORNING AND I’M SICK OF IT!
the two men stare at her startled
jordan: (glares at both men) if you two are done swinging your [redacted]s around i am going to tell you what the fuck we’re going to do. you two head to the apartment. owen has the key and junie should be expecting you.
she turns to owen, wagging her finger in his face
jordan: (through her teeth) i’m taking your car to ikea and i’m going to get a new bed frame. by the time you both are done unloading everything into the new place, i can meet you downstairs with the frame, which you–
she then quickly turns to jared and jabs him in the chest with her finger
jordan: — will put together. while you are doing that, owen will help me unpack. after that’s done, (through her teeth) the two of you will go home QUIETLY and leave me the entire fuck alone for the rest of the night! are we clear?!
both men nod quickly. she pushes through them, flips them off, and lets out an aggravated scream.
owen: (smiling lewdly) god, i’m gonna miss that…forceful nature of hers…
jared: (disgusted groan) ugh reign it in, 50 shades. get the hand-truck loaded and let’s go.
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